Kissing is Good For You! But you probably already knew that.

This is for you husbands and wives! In honor of Valentine’s Day, the Yahoo home page had links to several articles about romance and I liked this one especially. Kissing is good for you . . . and here is a summary of the five reasons why.

1.) Kissing boosts immunity.
2.) Kissing helps you pick the best mate (I might add reminds you why they are)
3.) Kissing burns calories!
4.) Kissing keeps facial muscles strong.
5.) Kissing naturally relaxes you.

I have a philosophy – which I have written about before – but here it is:

A 30 second kiss EVERY DAY will enhance and improve the state of your marriage. Now I am a firm believer that some days should involve kisses that last longer than 30 seconds, but I am talking about a daily habit for married couples.

This kiss will force each of you to focus completely on the other for this half a minute. A quick peck or any form of duty kiss will not cause a change of focus on your spouse. It’s still a good thing to do, but a 30-second kiss says something different.

A serious kiss can say several things. “I love you.” “I love what this could lead to later.” Or it simply says, “No matter what else has happened today, coming home to you, seeing you again, gives me great joy and comfort.”

A serious kiss says: I choose you!

Today I received a huge gift . . .

I started that sentence four days ago and have not been able to finish the thought because the magnitude of it continues to run through my thinking — every day now for the past 4 days the memory of my feelings when I saw it.

You see, I know this person and a little bit about their life. Kind, somewhat quiet, devoted parent, single, faithful employee, loves God.

I am humbled by the magnitude of the giving heart connected with the significant value of this gift. I am embarrassed that I have not yet written the thank you note, but I think it’s because I am touched beyond words and don’t know if I my gratitude can be expressed adequately enough. (Not a reason, by the way, to not say thank you). I am humbled.

The best way to respond? Receive it and be grateful. Next best thing to do? Give. Give to someone else. Look for the exact place. Be aware of those around me and be there to make a difference.

“Hope is a well founded and confident belief that a specific vision (goal, desire or promise) will be achieved or fulfilled within a specific amount of time.”

This quote is from the book by Steven K. Scott I mentioned in my last post. The Richest Man Who Ever Lived is about King Solomon, author of the book of Proverbs – practical life wisdom at its finest. Yes, Proverbs is just that good.

Again,hope is a confident belief that a specific goal or promise will be fulfilled within a specific amount of time.

So basically, when you make a commitment, a promise or even a statement that you will do something, and give a time frame for it, your family and your friends will take you at your word. That’s what we call trust. You say something. You do it. You make a promise. You fulfill it. You say you are going to be somewhere. You show up. You say you love him. You go to the game. You say you love her. You go to her ballet recital. You say you appreciate her. Get home to dinner on time. You make a promise. You fulfill it. Trust. Repeat. Repeat.

But here’s the other side of that coin. Promises broken. Commitments not kept. Disappointment. Trust broken. Hearts hurt.

Proverbs 13:12: “Hope deferred makes the heart sick. . . “

When hope is put off, you lose your emotional energy and momentum. You know the feeling. We have all experienced it in one form or another. When we build hope for others and then don’t come through, we then defer others’ hopes. They lose their emotional energy and motivation. They lose their trust in us.

It’s no small thing.

I am a parent of two (now adult) children who at one point each received the car keys for a solo ride. I think this is one of the biggest trust experiences for parents and kids. Yeah, one of the biggest. So we lay out the rules. The kids say “Got it.” “Don’t you trust me?” “I promise I won’t talk on the phone or text while driving. I will be home on time and I will let you know when I get to where I am going.” Hope is instilled. Trust is at the door.

Then the phone call doesn’t come when they arrive at their destination. First response? It comes from the heart. You could call it a “sick” feeling … that hope deferred. Parents know what I am talking about. Some worry tries to creep in, disappointment. The good news — nothing is wrong. They just forgot. Well, you can give your kids another chance. (You must if they are ever going to learn this life skill called driving). And they will straighten up and remember next time… because they want your trust. It’s a big deal.

Fulfilling promises is a big deal.

Proverbs 13:12 says “But desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” Desire fulfilled, promises kept, your word being true is a source of life. It feeds your relationships. It gives vision to your children of what integrity looks like. It grows your own character. It makes you a vessel that God can use. It makes you a vessel your family can believe in. It gives you motivation that your own words are true.

We all have them. It’s what gets us going in the morning . . . most of the time. Some days the only thing that gets us going is obligation. But those are the hard mornings.

I’m talking about most days . . . when the anticipation of the first sip of coffee is a happy thing all by itself. Mornings. I really love casual, easy, slow mornings. Coffee, Bible, other books (I read several at a time . . . all over the house), newspaper, birds chattering, coffee, quiet. Saturdays are the best.

Some weeks just the expectation and hope of Saturdays can help us get to them. We know expectation well. We understand hope. We embrace it.

FROM THE DICTIONARY: EXPECT, ANTICIPATE, HOPE, AWAIT all imply looking to some future event. EXPECT implies confidently believing, usually for good reasons that an event will occur. ANTICIPATE is to look forward to an event and even to picture it. HOPE implies a wish that an event may take place and an expectation that it will. AWAIT (WAIT FOR) implies being alert and ready.

Yesterday I heard this quote: “Hope is the last thing that dies.”

I have been thinking about that for the last 24 hours. It’s because of hope we make New Year resolutions (which are often the same as the year before and the year before that). It’s because of hope we dream about our future. It’s hope that causes us to invest in retirement accounts. Hope is the reason we have children. It’s why we buy calendars and planners. Hope is the reason we get puppies. And what causes us to keep our resume updated. Hope is why we have height charts in our kids’ rooms. Hope is why we buy green bananas and plant tulip bulbs in the fall. Hope is why we give to the cause of Haiti’s rebirth. Hope keeps us going.

Hope – Mankind’s Perpetual Fuel. Hope can be defined as a well founded and confident belief that a specific vision (goal, desire, or promise) will be achieved or fulfilled within a specified amount of time.” This quote is from a great book The Richest Man Who Ever Lived by Steven Scott. (I highly recommend it).

Hope – a well founded and confident belief that a specific vision (goal, desire, or promise) will be achieved or fulfilled within a specified amount of time.

As you review your goals (again) and (still), each step completed gives you more hope that you will achieve that goal. Each step. One at a time. Hour by hour. Day by day. Week after week. Hope is the emotional and mental power to go to the next step. Hope produces progress.

That’s what it takes . . . it’s man’s fuel – his emotional fuel, his mental fuel . . . It’s real. It speaks. It keeps us moving. It’s from God. It’s good stuff!

Romans 15:13: “God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in Him.” And trusting Him, will cause you to overflow with confident hope.

Overflowing confident hope. God gives freely to those who ask. He is not a withholder. He’s a giver. Every time. Now that will help us get some things done!

In recent weeks I have heard these words . . . and the humbling thing . . . the most humbling thing about this is that it was addressed to me personally.

It’s easy to brush it off. Act as if it doesn’t matter much. I could have heard it as an off-handed comment without much substance. But, instead, I received it as an assignment.

I have an assignment. You have an assignment. Someone should want to be just like me. Often I think it could be my daughter. After all, I’m a girl; she’s a girl. I like shoes; she likes shoes. I laugh easily; she also has a great sense of humor. Maybe there are characteristics that will become part of who my son is becoming. I like to read and be challenged and amazed by the complexity of words well written; so does he. I think I am a kind person; he is very kind, respectful young man.

But more than these two precious lives, I want to be an example to others beyond my immediate family. How do I do that?

Two words: On Purpose.

Purpose Defined: Something set up as an object or end to be attained. Intention. Resolution. Determination. A subject under discussion or an action in course of execution.

On Purpose: By intent: intentionally.

On Purpose – with firm conviction and intention I must decide that this is important and a primary objective for myself.

We know that January is a time, historically, for making resolutions. It’s a time that most people review, reflect and make a concentrated effort to identify the things in their lives they should change, improve upon, or add to their lives.

That’s what I am doing. For me, I want to do things on purpose. I want to use my time on purpose – for teaching, training, guiding, helping. I want to use my time wisely – in the serious things, and in the fun things. I want to use my time to play well. Rest well. Take care of myself well.

I want to use my time, on purpose, to be transparent to others, so that I am approachable, easy to talk to, open to ideas.

On purpose, I want to be a woman, known to love the Lord, love her family, her friends, her church, and along the way, like who I am as I do it.

How about you? Are you satisfied with yourself? Do you like you? Would you want to grow up to be like you?

It’s still January . . . a perfect time to review, reflect and make a new plan. Resolve. Do it on purpose.

Somebody’s watching.